Anne: “Do you think that I shall ever have a bosom friend in Avonlea?
Marilla: “A—a what kind of friend?”
Anne: “A bosom friend—an intimate friend, you know—a really kindred spirit to whom I can confide my innermost soul. I’ve dreamed of meeting her all my life.”
Anyone who has ever read or watched Anne of Green Gables or Anne of Avonlea can’t help be enchanted by Anne and her “bosom friend” Diana. They are quite a pair. What stands out most is the trust, loyalty, and longevity of their friendship. Their friendship warms the heart.
I have a dear young friend who wants desperately to cultivate a “bosom friend” like Anne has in Diana. Because she has moved quite a few times, she hasn’t had the chance to nourish friendships the way she would like. She is impatient to share her life, her dreams, her goals, her tears and her laughter with a close friend….other than her spouse.
I spent many years telling myself I didn’t need girlfriends because I had Daniel…he has always been my best friend. But he isn’t a girl. Aside from that fact, he is too close. That may sound strange but it’s the truth. How can I mull over my emotional state with him? First, he’s probably part of my emotional state, and second, he can’t possibly understand the emotions of a woman. It’s a fundamental girl/guy difference.
Bosom friends aren’t found easily. They have to earn the right to enter your heart in a way that can be trusted. They don’t have to begin a confidence with, “This is just between you and me…..“. Underlying loyalty, honesty and trustworthiness are a given. And that takes time. Sometimes years.
How do you find a bosom friend? By first being a good friend to others. Seeking out people with whom you have a common bond. Then nurturing and noticing the few who listen to you because they are genuinely interested. Friends who nourish your soul, feed your spirit, tell you the truth in love while rejoicing in your happiness, success and cheering you on. They are few. You may only have one or two in your whole lifetime. But that is all you need. Someone to hold your hand and shed tears with you because she hurts when you hurt. Someone who laughs outrageously with you. Someone besides your spouse, your mother or your sister.
In a few days I am flying to Northern California to spend a week with my “bosom friend” Irene Hall. I dedicated my Creating a Haven of Peace book to her and her husband, Jerry. I have known Irene for over 40 years. A few years ago we made a pact that we would see each other at least twice a year. One of us flies to the other. We always take up where we left off like we were never separated. We make a point to keep feeding our friendship and not let it die just because we are separated by two thousand miles. I know without doubt we will always be there for one another. She is a gift from God to me.
Do you have a “bosom friend”? I’d love to hear about her/him. What’s the one thing you cherish most in that friendship? I’m interested to know…..